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Man Absorbs Entire RPG Backblast with Groin After Castratophic Malfunction

Published Sept. 24, 2021

A man in the middle of a gunfight in Afghanistan attempts to prep an RPG when suddenly the weapon system causes a castratophic malfunction. That was not a typo.


You know what, people have bad days all the time. You, right now, you could be having a bad day. It could be one of the worst days ever. Maybe you got two flat tires on your way to work, or you spilled your coffee on your keyboard as soon as you sat down at the office today. Regardless of how bad your day is going, it's got nothing on this guy's bad day.


There he was, in the mountains of Afghanistan getting wrapped up into a firefight he probably didn't want anything to do with, when his buddy Jamsheed handed him an RPG and told him to try and hit an enemy position with it. Little did he know, Jamsheed is the RPG god, and this was simply a prank he was playing on his friend. So, handling his new RPG, he kneeled down and started getting everything prepped to go, and then the rocket malfunctioned.


The malfunction fired the rocket straight into the air, not hitting anything. Unfortunately, this also caused the tube to expel a bunch of gas and force out of the back of the tube in a fun little thing Hollywood always forgets about called backblast. Also unfortunately, he had the end of the rocket tube stuck right between his legs, making it so that his groin absorbed a majority of that backblast.


Somewhere in the background you can hear Jamsheed, in perfect Dari, saying "It's just a prank bro."


That's what I call a Castratophic Malfunction. Also, if you understand the joke I'm making, we can be friends. If not, don't worry. Not everyone can understand dad jokes.


josh brooks

Published Sept. 24, 2021

A man in the middle of a gunfight in Afghanistan attempts to prep an RPG when suddenly the weapon system causes a castratophic malfunction. That was not a typo.


You know what, people have bad days all the time. You, right now, you could be having a bad day. It could be one of the worst days ever. Maybe you got two flat tires on your way to work, or you spilled your coffee on your keyboard as soon as you sat down at the office today. Regardless of how bad your day is going, it's got nothing on this guy's bad day.


There he was, in the mountains of Afghanistan getting wrapped up into a firefight he probably didn't want anything to do with, when his buddy Jamsheed handed him an RPG and told him to try and hit an enemy position with it. Little did he know, Jamsheed is the RPG god, and this was simply a prank he was playing on his friend. So, handling his new RPG, he kneeled down and started getting everything prepped to go, and then the rocket malfunctioned.


The malfunction fired the rocket straight into the air, not hitting anything. Unfortunately, this also caused the tube to expel a bunch of gas and force out of the back of the tube in a fun little thing Hollywood always forgets about called backblast. Also unfortunately, he had the end of the rocket tube stuck right between his legs, making it so that his groin absorbed a majority of that backblast.


Somewhere in the background you can hear Jamsheed, in perfect Dari, saying "It's just a prank bro."


That's what I call a Castratophic Malfunction. Also, if you understand the joke I'm making, we can be friends. If not, don't worry. Not everyone can understand dad jokes.


josh brooks

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