Idiot Suicide Bomber Sucked Out Of Plane, Only Casualty

first published on February 5, 2016 by

A suspected al-Shabaab Islamist attempted to down a passenger jet by detonating a bomb he was able to smuggle on board, but was only successful in killing his idiot self. The suicide bomber was able to bypass thorough security measures by disguising himself as a physically disabled person in a wheelchair. Event took place in early 2016.

Upon detonation, the bomb ripped a hole in the fuselage of the aircraft, causing the idiot radical to be sucked out while in flight. Other passengers were alarmed, but nobody besides the suicide bomber were injured in the attack.